尽管每次分手都不同，但有些人发现一个时刻确实可以将事物带入视角。所以，我们asked这BuzzFeed Community大约在他们意识到自己的婚姻结束的那一刻。
Here are just some of the responses we received:
Content warning: Some mentions of domestic abuse.
1。"When I saw the text messages between him and his 19-year-old coworker when I was six months pregnant. He left me a week before our second daughter was born..."
“这实际上是一个伪装的祝福。我与他离婚。我继续前进，遇到了一个比他以前更好的对待我，结婚的人，我们向我们的家人添加了另一个孩子。我的新老公称我们为我们的预制家庭 -太可爱了！”
2。"First major sign was when he admitted to not searching for a job the whole first six months of unemployment..."
"Second and last straw was when I was repainting our new condo. He was playing computer games while hungover, and I asked him politely to move his desk so I could paint behind. He moved it a fucking inch. Asked again and same thing happened. I could smell the ammonia on his breath and knew that was it. He was a damn fool, lazy, and an alcoholic. The laziness and no ambition got me the most."
3。"We were at my older brother's wedding. I saw the way my siblings looked at their significant others and the way they looked at my siblings, and knew it was over. We just didn't look at each other the same way anymore."
4。"It wasn’t when I got a message on Facebook from his other woman — or even all of those moments when he hit me. It was when I sliced my thumb open, and he refused to come home during his lunch break because he was down the street at his buddy’s house..."
“我最好的朋友的丈夫在雨中走到我的房子里，帮助我把拇指绷紧了，清理了地板上的血液。”
5。"I knew it was over when he told me while trying to have sex with me — after I worked a 12-hour shift and he stayed home doing nothing — that if I lost weight I could look like his FAVORITE PORNSTAR. Yep."
6。“当我发现他在整个八年的恋爱关系中都与30人一起睡觉时，我知道已经结束了。其中一些显然是经常发生的。”
7。"He insisted that a freshly cooked dinner be on the table for him and our three kids no later than 6 every night, despite: 1) I didn’t get off work until 4.30 p.m., and 2) I was the only one who could pick up the kids after work since he purposely cut the seat belts out of his car so he couldn’t pick them up..."
“一个晚上，急于处理一切，我用一把屠夫刺穿了我的手。我大声敲打，鲜血到处都是。我的前任的回答是，'哇。好吧，我想晚餐会今晚很晚。'我的手张开六十天后，我与他离婚了。”
8."I had been on vacation with my ex. As soon as we got on the plane for the six-hour flight home, he told me tearfully that he had made out with a woman at the resort we had just left. I felt nothing — no anger, no sadness, nothing. At the time, I thought it was shock. In retrospect, I realized I felt nothing because I wasn’t there anymore."
9."My ex and I were trying to make things work, and he left flowers in my car. Objectively, it was so sweet. But my heart and gut were crushed because my first thought was that I wish he hadn’t done that. I was already done. That was the beginning of the end."
10."Twenty-year marriage — I found out while he was in surgery that he was talking to women on Facebook, telling them he was separated and sending them money (money I was transferring him to pay bills). I went to counseling on my own, and my therapist asked, 'What do you want to do?' My answer was, 'To be happy.' That was the moment I knew the marriage was over."
11。“发生车祸，由于受伤而被给了20,000美元。大约一年后，我怀孕了，还有我的和解的剩余7,000美元。我计划将这笔钱付给我儿子的储蓄POS汽车更重要！”
12。"I was one day out of the hospital with my newborn via C-section, and my husband confessed that he cheated on me multiple times during our six years together. The other woman was pregnant with twins."
13。“我有食物中毒，刚刚在浴室里呕吐了过去的半小时。我终于能够躺在床上，我翻身问他是否可以给我姜汁啤酒 - 我发现他发现他正在浏览赃物和Instagram上的色情帐户...”
“我什么都没说。我只是起身，穿好衣服，离开了。我没有回头。在那之前我应该留下很多理由，但是那是一个只是为我付出的东西。”
14。“当他威胁要打我的狗时。当他威胁要打我时，我的狗（那时一只5个月大的小狗！）对他咆哮。”
-kaa
15。“当我开始戴耳机上床睡觉时。起初，我告诉自己是白噪声，所以我可以入睡，但最终我意识到这是为了避免与她交谈 - 因为任何对话都是100％会变成一场战斗。”
16。"I knew I no longer loved my ex when my grandfather, who I was very close with, died. I was having a hard time processing his death and went to my ex crying once because I was sad. He looked at me, sighed, and in an angry tone said, 'What’s wrong with you? Why are you crying?' I told him and he just said, 'Well, I don’t know how to help you...'"
“我们还花了三个月的时间才结束它，因为我的自我价值在这种恋爱关系中受到了如此损害。我认为与他在一起和痛苦比独自一人更好。”
17。"She struggled to control her spending, but we worked on it together for years. We were always adjusting the budget to give her more spending money. The issue got worse with time — until we emptied all of our savings to cover her spending leaks. We then had an expensive home repair hit us unexpectedly, and we had no money to cover it, so I met with a banker to apply for a loan. He pulled our credit reports, and I discovered she had over $50,000 in secret debt all accrued in the last few years of our marriage..."
“我接近她，她的回答是，'我们只有不同的财务目标。'我害怕我们孩子的未来，知道是时候离开了。”
18。"When he didn't get me anything for my birthday, not even a card. Then he went away with friends a few days later and didn't tell me what city he was going to — and didn't contact me the entire time he was gone. This was before cellphones, so I had no way to reach him. He laughed when I cried about it."
19."Was in the military and my (now-ex) husband said he wouldn’t be able to make it to a medal-pinning ceremony because his mom said she needed for him to replace the brakes in her car — that she'd barely driven..."
"I’d been away for four months prior to this, and was really looking forward to seeing him and our son. I’d already had MY mother schedule and pay for the flights for everyone, but he ended up being a no-show — Because. Of. Brakes. Ex-husband has been married and divorced twice more now for the same reason: 'My mom needs me.'"
20."I went to an art museum by myself because he was 'too busy' that day. I walked into the French 1800s section and saw Pierre Auguste Cot’s 'Springtime.' I cried in the Met, because I realized that portrait of two lovers made me feel more love than he ever had. He never looked at me with that look. That was the moment I understood that it was over, without ever actually having begun. My friends now call a moment of realization in a relationship 'a painting moment.'"
21."When we were separated, my 3-year-old son and I were living with my grandparents, and he asked me if I liked his daddy. I said, 'Yeah buddy, I love your daddy.' He looked at me and said, 'Why? Daddy yells at you and makes you cry.’ That killed me, and I knew it was finally over. Thankfully he doesn’t remember all that."
22."After 13 years of marriage and me supporting his demanding military career, getting his degree, getting out, changing careers, getting a good job, I decided to finally go back to school. First, he practically demanded I quit my job because I couldn't possibly do both and still support him and the kids. Then when that didn't happen, he decided that was a good time to ramp up the self-medicating he was doing beyond alcohol. I drew a line, he crossed it, lied about it, and then lied about it some more..."
"But the final straw? Finding his AdultFriendFinder account that he signed up for while I was in the other room taking a test for school — two days before I left with the kids to visit family for two weeks. He later lied to my face and tried to say it was something I had done when I came back that caused him to get the account, it, even though I knew he signed up before I even left. Then when he couldn't lie his way out of it anymore, said it was 'to help take the pressure off' — like it was for MY benefit."
Did you have a moment when you realized your marriage was over? LMK in the comments!
注意：一些响应已被编辑为长度和/或清晰度。