Hi. I'm Jake, and I have a REALLY SERIOUS mission for you.
![Man smiling and saying "Please! I need your help!"](https://img.buzzfeed.com/buzzfeed-static/static/2023-01/10/20/asset/d96dc791faed/sub-buzz-4470-1673383492-6.jpg?crop=1491%3A2004%3B249%2C361&downsize=700%3A%2A&output-quality=auto&output-format=auto)
I really need to know if you consider these 25 completely random things homosexual, heterosexual, or bisexual.
![Are tarot cards gay, is soccer straight, is the band Paramore bisexual?](https://img.buzzfeed.com/buzzfeed-static/static/2023-01/10/20/asset/19ffb2c06e44/sub-buzz-1631-1673383118-1.jpg?downsize=700%3A%2A&output-quality=auto&output-format=auto)
Disney Channel is gay, Nickelodeon is straight, and Cartoon Network is bi. Am I wrong?
You might be laughing and think this is a big joke, or you might even be rolling your eyes, but it's actually really important, top-secret research. Like, I've already said too much.