1.
IT’S DECEMBER YOU KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS
2.
When a Muppet is sitting with their legs hanging free
3.
Tesla drivers say disdain for Elon Musk is resulting in abuse from other motorists, as they can’t even park across three parent and child spaces anymore without people glaring at them.
4.
If he was real, Batman would be one of the world’s less weird billionaires
5.
My shower gel is £1 but my washing up liquid is £2. Why am I spending twice as much to clean my plates as I am to clean myself? We're both covered in the same pasta sauce.
6.
Ratatouille but it’s a malevolent frog making Matt Hancock kill the elderly
7.
i didn’t care for ed edd n eddy… even at a tender age i had the capacity to recognise beauty and glamour. i could see something decidedly unchic was afoot
8.
Sam Sparro punching the air rn https://t.co/6TOX6WjZf7
9.
Did Jack Grealish just say "we were the best thing since sliced veg" ???
10.
Roy Keane looks about three years away from living in a lighthouse.
11.
The kids at the orphanage when Stuart Little - a mouse - gets chosen ahead of them.
12.
My bedside table
13.
My kids have just discovered that the family sick bowl and the cake mix bowl are one and the same. In my defence, this was also the case when I was growing up … but now I’ve said it out loud, I realise I need to break the cycle. I won’t be taking any further questions.
15.
Your da during the cost of living crisis https://t.co/Gx3WiI3rNJ
16.
Southgate watching Maddison warm up
17.
#imaceleb
18.
this is what i imagine it would be like to study english literature in an american high school https://t.co/vJDg6815g3
19.
If you know, you know.
20.
I just need you to see the stairs in an apartment I viewed. Am I a mountain goat?
21.
Me when my friend Aütof Alda has dementia and can’t remember their name